Doggie Jokes

What is the difference between a cat and a comma?
One has the paws before the claws and the other has the clause before the pause

What is a vampire’s favourite dog?
 A Bloodhound!

What kind of pets lay around the house?
Car-pets!

What’s worse than raining cats and dogs?
Hailing elephants!

What do you call a dog that is a librarian?
A hush-puppy!

What do you get when you cross a mean dog and a computer?
You get a mega-bite!

Why couldn’t the Dalmatian hide from his pal?
Because he was already spotted!

What do you do with a blue Burmese?
Try and cheer it up!

What happened to the dog that ate nothing but garlic?
His bark was much worse that his bite!

What do you get if you cross a dog with a Concorde?
A jet-setter!

Why do dogs bury bones in the ground?
Because you can't bury them in trees!

 Why did the poor dog chase his own tail?
 He was trying to make both ends meet!

 What do you get if you cross a sheepdog with a rose?
 A collie-flower!

Why do dogs wag their tails?
"Because no one else will do it for them!"

Why didn't the dog speak to his foot?
Because it's not polite to talk back to your paw!

What is the dogs favorite city?
New Yorkie!

Who is the dogs favorite comedian?
Growlcho Marx!

What did the cowboy say when the bear ate Lassie?
"Well, doggone!"

What happened when the dog went to the flea circus?
He stole the show!

How can if you have a stupid dog?
It chases parked cars!